Oh! We're all going on a... Summer Holiday

I must begin with apologies to all the Visitors and Relatives for my absence – I’m afraid we’ve all been stuck like limpets to the Tannoy Speaker in the Nurse’s Lounge every spare minute we can, waiting for the latest news on the disaster in the American Annexe as it filters through to our hospital radio station Asylum 700 FM - “You’re here ‘cause we say so”.

…And unless you’ve been living under a rock, or have been in Isolation with Pat Roberts, you’ll have seen and heard hours and hours of media commentary and opinion on what’s been happening; the sheer human misery, the heart-rending bravery, the criminal incompetence of Federal Authorities, the clamour of sleazy Whitehouse dis-information specialists lining up the Scapegoats, and the ever-growing roar of the political Tectonic Aftershock which, if there’s any justice in this Flying Spaghetti Monster Universe we live in, could be the beginning of the end for Inmate Bush and his fellow Mafia Parasites - Condoleeza Rice, Dick Cheyne and Donald Rumsfeld- who between them, in the midst of the Carnage of Katrina :

• Played golf,
• Gave a speech in San Diego comparing the War (that he started) with World War II
• Strummed a guitar onstage, with Country Creep Mark Wills
• Shot off in the opposite direction to a Republican Party fund-raiser,
• Snuck off back to Texas to finish his holiday
  

Or…

• Caught that absolutely HILARIOUS Monty Python musical ‘Spamalot’ on Broadway - after the hurricane.
• Shopped for $1,000 ‘Fuck-Me’ Shoes from Ferragamo on Fifth Avenue, (...and had some Uppity, lower-class Bitch kicked out by Security) after the hurricane.
• Knocked about a few tennis balls with Monica Seles, after the hurricane.

Or…

• Squeezed in a spot of Fishin’, Shootin’ and Plottin’ on keeping his hideous arse dry.
  
  Did a bit of House-Hunting in St. Michael’s, Maryland, to be nearer his pal Rumsfeld…
• Whilst planning a jaunt up to Fort McMurray oilsands complex
• and whilst he’s there he’ll putting in a bit of arcane ‘Us’ Time with his pals at the shady… sorry… Independent Fraser Institute.

Or…

• Popped up to San Diego to see a Baseball game!

Yes, you heard me right. It’s all true. Latoya and Cherenise from Halli-Mart Cleaning Services (Beijing) had been digging through the Inmate’s waste bins looking for scraps of food, and, with the help of thirty rolls of Scotch Tape and quite a bit of falling over, were able to show me and Maureen the irrefutable proof of this sordid business.

Now… whilst I fully appreciate that this is a Lunatic Asylum, there’s got to be a limit to the amount of abuse and disregard that can be dished out by the Category A Inmates, before we can haul them down to the Electro Shock Unit. They're not even sorry for their arrogance and incompetence. This is just beyond the pale!

I just have this to say: If the Visitors wanted to form an angry, howling, torch-waving Lynch Mob, and storm Frankenbush's Castle and burn it to the ground, I think I would have to... *cough*... look the other way until the sounds of slapping and squealing died down!

Well! You've all been very good today, so as a little reward, and to celebrate the (relative) brevity of today’s Blog, we’re going to have a little Mental Health Quiz:

Q1) Who is being quoted here?

(New Orleans Astrodome - Monday) …and along the way she opined that many of the refugees from New Orleans were so poor to begin with that they ought to be pretty happy with their temporary digs in Houston. "What I’m hearing, which is sort of scary, is they all want to stay in Texas," B*** B*** said in comments first aired on the public radio program "Marketplace" and reprinted by Editor & Publisher. "Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality. And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this is working very well for them."

In the midst of that last line, you can hear the former **** **** chuckling.

CLICK HERE FOR CLUE

Q2) And who said this on “Good Morning America” on March 18^th, 2003, just 36 hours before Bush declared his criminal war on Iraq?

“But why should we hear about body bags, and deaths, and how many, what day it's gonna happen, and how many this or what do you suppose? Or, I mean, it's, it's not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that? And watch him suffer."

NO IDEA? CLICK HERE

Q3) Who said THIS on CNN’s Larry King Show, Sept. 6^th, 2005?

"I think any time there's a crisis people want to blame someone. I've never been much for the Monday morning quarterbacking and to be very candid, Larry, I think some of the criticism had been grossly unfair, particularly when they suggest the president doesn't care and all of that.

"You have to understand that people that are hurting are going to criticize. I thought President Clinton put it pretty well today when he said 'Let's get on with it and then there will be plenty of time to assign blame.'

"But you know the media has a fascination, Larry, and you know this, I'm not saying you but the media has a fascination with the blame game and instead of looking for what can we do to help now there's a lot of why didn't we do something different?"

Click HERE for ANSWER

Q4) Who was THIS describing?

“The Lord Jesus Christ is going to come on time, so be patient”, the drowning are told...

R*** took a break to tell the hurricane victims dying hourly in their homes that their prolonged suffering is God's will, not the government's fault, and to
lecture them on the virtue of patience:

Asked to say a few words from the pulpit, R***, a preacher's daughter, said: "The Lord Jesus Christ is going to come on time." She added: "If we just wait."

Earlier at the same church service "R*** nodded in agreement as the Rev. Malone
Smith Jr. advised the congregation, "Wait for the Lord." Rev. Smith and
Secretary R*** were playing on the words of a beloved gospel hymn that says, "He may not be there when you want him but he's right on time." They should both be ashamed of themselves.

The blame is not God's, or nature's, or fate's, or that of statistical happenstance. Whatever your conception of a Higher Power may or may not be, the United
States was given everything it needed to cope with this disaster better than it has. God was on time: it is Rice and her colleagues that were too late. And when human beings are dying, it's a sin to suggest that we - or anyone - "wait."

Somewhere, as I write, there is an American drowning while R*** and her boss suggest that he or she "wait." That's not God's will, it's this Administration's. They should not hide behind God's skirts. And they should be ashamed of themselves for trying.

No? Can’t believe your eyes? CLICK HERE

How’re you all doing so far?

Q5) Who is THIS article talking about?

B*** had raised eyebrows on his first trip by, among other things, picking Sen. Trent Lott, (Repub., Mississipi) instead of the thousands of mostly poor and black storm victims - as an example of loss. "Out of the rubbles of Trent Lott's house - he's lost his entire house - there's going to be a fantastic house. And I'm looking forward to sitting on the porch," B*** said with a laugh from an airplane hangar in Mobile, Alabama.

NEED A CLUE?

SCORING: 5 Correct - Top marks! You'll be excused latrine duties all week
3-4 Correct - Not Bad! You get to wear the Ward's underpants all day!
1-2 Correct - Pathetic! No pudding for you today.
0 Correct - Miserable! It's your turn in the Barrel of Love!